Boys Need Besties, Too

Updated: Feb 4, 2021

FLAW- Friendless

LAW- Friendship

During a Facebook LIVE a while ago, Stacey and I were talking about the differences between a man and a woman's need for Friendship. A dear friend of Flaws exclaimed in the comments: “Boys need besties, too!”

This brought me a real good laugh because in my house there is a running conversation about Friendship. My husband believes you don't need it to live a fulfilling life, and my stepson passionately disagrees. This bestie battle tips in my stepson's favor, as I step in right next to him to take my place in the fight for Friendship.

We often have healthy debates, with each side pointing out the benefits and disadvantages of Friendship, or the lack thereof. My husband says with disdain that, “Friends only call you for two things: one, because they need something and two, they need to vent!" My response is “What’s wrong with that?!” and my stepson proclaims, “That means they trust you, Dad!”

But no matter what, we get the same outcome every time as our conversations come to a draw. Team Friendship (my stepson and I) swear that Team Friendless (my husband) is in desperate need of Friendship, and he declares that he is completely fine without it.

I still have a secret hope that God will send my husband a friend to prove him WRONG, lol. The only way to win this war is for him to experience it for himself. There is a joy that my stepson and I have found in our own besties, who we can call and “VENT” all of our hurts and dreams to, when we “NEED” to have a good laugh or a good cry, or just need someone to bring a little magic to the mundane of our everyday lives. That kind of joy can never be found alone.

A God-given Friendship has the potential to affect every aspect of our lives for the better, and brings with it a stability that will make us brave enough to be ourselves and ready to face, and even change, the world.

All we have to do is open ourselves up to the possibility that Friendship might just be an actual necessity for living life to its fullest.

If you're reading this, then you may be on Team Friendship and are living your "best-ie life" beside someone who will happily answer your phone call with ears ready to listen, feet ready to move, hands open to give, and a heart willing to love you, flaws and all.

If you happen to be on Team Friendless, feeling completely satisfied without a close friend, I encourage you to ask yourself a few questions:

  1. When was the last time I had a close friendship?

  2. Did that friendship end well?

  3. Is it hard for me to trust others?

Let's throw a few more questions in there for everyone:

4. On a scale from1-10, how good of a friend am I?

5. Close your eyes. Ask God what He loves about being YOUR Friend.

(Write it down. Believe it. Live it.)


I pray we all get to explore and experience God-given Friendships that will take us deeper, call us higher, and require us to be changed for the better through this Spirit Empowered Connection.


Obviously at the Flaws we are Team Friendship all the way, and although we are all about our Sisterhood, this week on the podcast we thought it would be fun to talk with my stepson, Christopher, and his best friend, Justin, about all things Friendship because after all, BOYS NEED BESTIES TOO, RIGHT!?

Keep Fighting the Good Fight, Besties,

Tabatha Haines

54 views0 comments